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The Arrogance of Authority

this was too good not to share!!!

A DEA officer stopped at a ranch in Texas , and talked with an old rancher.

He told the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs."

The rancher said, "Okay , but don't go in that field over there.....", as he pointed out the location.

The DEA officer verbally exploded saying, " Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me !"

Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the rancher.

"See this badge?! This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish.... On any land !!

No questions asked or answers given!! Have I made myself you understand ?!!"

The rancher nodded politely, apologized, and went about his chores.

A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams, looked up, and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull......

With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that he'd sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified.

The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs.....

(I just love this part....)

"Your badge, show him your BADGE........ ! !"


Why Do Bad Things Happen?

Or why do really inconvenient things happen all on the same day?
Some one posted this on Facebook and I had to share.

Me: God, can I ask you a question?

God: Sure

Me: Promise u won't get mad...
God: I promise

Me: Why did u let so much stuff happen to me today?

God: What do u mean?

Me: Well, I woke up late

God: Yes

Me: My car took forever to start

God: Okay

Me: at lunch they made my sandwich wrong & I had to wait

God: Huummm

Me: On the way home, my phone went DEAD, just as I picked up a call

God: All right

Me: And on top of it all off, when I got home ~I just want to soak my feet in my new foot massager & relax. BUT it wouldn't work!!! Nothing went right today! Why did you do that?

God: Let me see, the Death Angel was at your bed this morning & I had to send one of the other angels to battle him for your life. I let you sleep through that

Me (humbled): OH

GOD: I didn't let your car start because there was a drunk driver on your route that would have hit you if you were on the road.

Me: (ashamed)

God: The first person who made your sandwich today was sick & I didn't want you to catch what they have, I knew you couldn't afford to miss work.

Me (embarrassed):Ok

God: Your phone went dead bcuz the person that was calling was going to give false witness about what you said on that call, I didn't even let you talk to them so you would be covered.

Me (softly): I see God

God: Oh and that foot massager, it had a shortage that was going to throw out all of the power in your house tonight. I didn't think you wanted to be in the dark.

Me: I'm sorry God

God: Don't be sorry, just learn to trust all things , the good & the bad.

Me: I will trust you

God: And don't doubt that my plan for your day is always better than your plan.

Me: I won't God. And let me just tell you God, thank you for everything today.

God: You're welcome child. It was just another day being your God and I love looking after my children...

(Steph's side note) What if God only gave you everything you thanked Him for yesterday? I saw that some where on Facebook or Pinterest too and it really smacked me upside the head!


My Alternate Reality

While we were growing up, our parent's music was NOT what we kids felt as cool.
They listened to either twangy solid gold country or the dreaded elevator music.
I felt lucky if Dad put on some 50's or 60's rock. Well as "rock" as that gets!

Every time we drove up north to our grandparent's we listened to WOCO out of Oconto.
It was awful elevator music!! I can still hear the jingle in my head. WOCO... Oconto! AM and FM!! I silently screamed in the back seat. Dad thought it should be acceptable to us as he always turned on the FM station and not the AM. I don't even want to contemplate what could have been on the AM dial!!
I remember begging for anything with lyrics. Actual singers. But to no avail. It was the same crap my dentist played. I guess I can be happy there wasn't a drill involved.

Fast forward to Thanksgiving 2011.

Mom and her three girls were on the way to Thanksgiving Eve Service at the Moravian Church at Heritage Hill.
Some song came on the radio that I didn't know. I'm guessing we had a Top 40 station on. What ever the song was, the same lyrics were repeated over and over. I made some comment like "Sing if you know the words!" Only to realize Mom was already singing!!!
Wait... What???
Ok, maybe it was a fluke and a catchy tune. I just let it slide.

A couple nights later we were about to get down and dirty with our usual family fun
of playing Uno. We like the house rules for Seven-0 Uno.

(• Basically same play as Original Uno with 2 exceptions. When a "0" is played--all players need to pass their hands to the next player. When a "7" is played the person that played the "7" trades their hand with another player of their choice.

Anyway, I digress. Most of us were waiting around for Mom to get her self over to the table so we could start. She said, I want to watch this first. I walk over to see what she is watching that is so important as to interrupt our sacred Uno time. You will not believe this! In fact I thought she was joking.

The Lady Gaga Christmas Special!!! Of all things! My mom!!! Lady Gaga??? What is going on?
Did aliens come and abduct my mom and leave someone ( or something ) else in her place???
I of course looked shocked and questioned this person claiming to be my mom.
She said, "I like her."
And that is it. I have learned not to question my mom further. She is, and will always be, right. Sometimes with a little persuasion, I can try to change what she feels is right, but mostly, she's the bomb!

So from elevator music to Lady Gaga. It's been over 2 months since that night and I am STILL in shock. In fact, I may never be the same. When I was 16 I would have given my left arm for my mom to enjoy listening to WIXX with us! I guess she just wasn't ready. Also, at that time Lady Gaga was 2 years old. I guess she can't be all bed, her birth name is Stefani. :-) Perhaps we are soul sisters...
I really do enjoy her music for an upbeat workout, but have you seen some of those videos? A bit odd. I prefer this one.

Have your parents ever freaked you out like this? Please tell me about it so I don't feel alone!!!